The Craft Cocktail Movement – Op-Ed

A week or two ago, an article from Thrillist popped into my inbox, and I gave it a read. “The Crappy Craft Cocktail Revolution is Upon Us.

The author, Dan Dunn, is basically saying that a lot of places say they have craft cocktails but really they’re just pretending, they’re making them not well and only to make money. While this is probably true of some bars, I think it’s a gross generalization, and that he’s coming at it from a really odd angle. Honestly, it basically seems like he’s saying that the younger generation (millennials, us) doesn’t deserve to make cocktails, because they weren’t around when the cocktail revolution happened in the 80s.

He goes on two main tangents in the article, one about punk music selling out which is… whatever, and the other one which I think is bullshit. He complains that his bartender has sleeve tattoos but “[t]here was no way in his short time on the earth that he could have come by those babies honestly.” What the hell does that mean? You have no idea what this guy’s story is, what his reasons for getting the tattoos are, what he’s been through. Which is almost besides the point but it isn’t — his whole stance on the cocktail movement is that the new bartenders, the new mixologists can’t possibly have had the experience they need to really be bartenders. Which, again, is bullshit.

We make drinks because it’s fun, because it’s interesting, and it’s a way to experiment and show off new ideas. We’re not doing it just to make money, but we equally can’t very well do it without making money. He’s very hung up on selling out and being indebted to The Man, and I’m pretty sure that’s just called having a job.

He also seems very incensed by the fact that this particular Last Word, a cocktail that I’ve never had but seems kind of interesting, had too much green chartreuse. What’s the big deal? Sometimes people don’t make cocktails super well. You can’t expect every bartender in the city, even every bartender in an establishment to be at the top of their game. Some bartenders don’t know certain drinks. I was at Patina once, a classy Los Angeles spot, and they couldn’t make me a Vieux Carré, my favorite drink, because they didn’t know what it was. Did I make a fuss? No. It’s natural to not know everything, however much you might want someone to.

We also need to be taught. It’s not always said, but let’s face it. I’m here learning tricks from Jerry Thomas. If I worked at a bar, I’d expect to learn a thing or two from the older bartenders, find out about some new drinks, and so on. But what does Dan Dunn do when his drink isn’t made correctly? He says nothing about it, and instead makes some asinine joke about a drink that involves punching the bartender in the head. It might just be a literary device, rather than what happened, but either way that’s not how you get a good Last Word. Tell us what we’re doing wrong, and maybe we’ll make it right.

Finally, I just looked at his other articles on Thrillist. He only has two, this one lamenting the loss of the “true” craft cocktail movement, and another lamenting the loss of the cool culture in Abbot Kinney, stating that “Venice is dying.” It must be a sad life to be Dan Dunn.

I’m not saying it’s all him. I’ve definitely seen some overpriced “craft” cocktails before, Moscow Mules being toted as awesome new inventions, and the like. And I’ll probably still take those over an equally crappy rum and coke. But for Dunn to just scoff and reminisce about the good old days instead of doing something about it, that doesn’t help us. We want to learn, we want to make great drinks, and we try every day to do so. Don’t knock us down just because we don’t fit with your ideal of the classic bartender.

NOLA Brewing Company – News Flash

NOLA Brewing Tap Room
Source: Sarah Baird, http://bit.ly/1RhTkuE

In February (no, not during Mardi Gras, which I personally think is a good thing, but it’s up to you…) the PiC and I took a trip down to New Orleans, along with my brother and his wife — no code names there, otherwise that would start to get very confusing. We had a lot of different beverages throughout the trip, which I’ll go through in a later post, but this entry will be a continuation of my “drink many tiny beers at a brewery” series.

On our last day in New Orleans, we walked down to the NOLA Brewing Company space and had a flight of eight of their beers. They had a lot more than that, but we were but humans and could not really sample everything.

The brewery is down by the river — the mighty Mississippi! — and has a nice outdoor patio, as well as some indoor spaces with games, ping pong, and more. Sadly, there’s not so much of a river view (more of a warehouse view) but you know it’s out there somewhere. There were two bars, one upstairs and one downstairs, and then there was also a delicious barbecue window (McClure’s), with about 7 different sauces you could try. We had their mac and cheese and it was amazing, though we were also slightly inebriated so who knows. The brewery was within walking distance of our bed and breakfast, in the Garden District, which was very convenient, as the public transportation in the city left a lot to be desired. It was nice when we didn’t have to rely on a bus that was probably going to be 20 minutes late.

Anyways, we picked the 8 beers that we expected to like the most out of their offering. At the time we went, they had a ton of IPAs and other hoppy brews, so our choices were somewhat limited. We had also already had the Irish Channel Stout, which otherwise would have immediately made it onto our list. It was also good (more on that in the later post).

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Flambeau Red Ale
This was a little bitter, an little sweet, mostly tasted like a pretty typical red ale. Hoppy, but not in a terrible way.

NOLA Blonde
Very golden and blonde in color. It was nice looking, but tasted like nothing. It has a little bit of a fruitiness to it, and smells like honey — orange or clover were our thoughts. There was also a nice sweetness and it wasn’t hoppy at all. (What’s the word for not hoppy?) Could have drank this for a while, but probably wouldn’t want to.

Tea Birth
This was an earl-grey-infused version of their more classic Rebirth APA. And, it tasted pretty similar to what you would imagine that to taste like. The hops blended really well with the tea flavor, and I actually liked it (score another one for APAs!). I feel like APAs are the gateway IPAs — the hops don’t linger as much and so you can keep drinking after more than one sip. There was a clear bergamot aftertaste, in fact almost an aftersmell. If that’s a thing. But, just like 3D in a movie theater, it’s cool at first but you know you’ll forget about the bergamot by the end of drinking a pint. Pretty mild overall, but a nice drink.

Girl Stout Cookie
I GET IT. It smelled minty and a little creamy, but when I took a sip I thought it was pretty disgusting. Now, it did taste exactly like it was supposed to — chocolate and mint like a Thin Mint — but it turns out that those are flavors I don’t particularly like in my beer. The PiC didn’t hate it, but certainly thought it was odd.

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Out Tequil-ya: Sour Ale Aged in Tequila Barrels
The puns keep coming! PiC liked this a lot, though she also likes tequila and sours a lot so that stands to reason. For me, it was still a sour, and so I was conflicted. I actually didn’t mind it so much, and I liked the flavor, but I’d have trouble drinking a lot of it (like any sour, for me.) You could tell the tequila’s influence more at the beginning of a sip than the end. This beer made me realize one thing that might be part of the reason I don’t like sours, and you can see it in the picture up there — they’re often not very bubbly, and that makes it a weird drinking experience for me..

Breakfast Brown
This was ostensibly flavored with maple and other breakfasty things (cinnamon). I didn’t really taste much of the flavoring — it was more just like a brown ale, which is not a bad thing, especially after the Girl Stout experience. Certainly easy to drink and had a nice sweetness. The lack of flavor may also have been the mac and cheese that we got from the place downstairs and started devouring right about the time we tasted this one. I should start a mac and cheese blog. Delicious.

Scary Spiced Stout
While I was disappointed by the slightly misfired pun here — they should have just called it Scary Spice, without the d — I actually really liked this. It was flavored with cinnamon and chipotle, like mexican hot chocolate almost, and the flavor wasn’t overpowering like the GSC. It was also a little bitter, which cut through the flavor in a nice, beery way.

Desire: Raspberry Sour Ale
This smelled like the raspberry syrup I made for the various Jerry Thomas punches. It actually tasted like very tart raspberry juice, which was a nice end to the flight. If someone gave this to me on its own, with no description, I might not even know it was beer. PiC, of course, loved it.

Overall, it was a fun experience. NOLA had some of the first sours I’ve actually liked, and the pun quotient was right where it should be. New Orleans has a lot to offer, either in the drink line or otherwise, and this is a perfect place to take a look at. Next time you’re in town, take an afternoon and check them out!

12. Champagne Punch

Champagne Punch Hero

We were going to have a dinner party a few weekends ago. The party didn’t end up happening, due to the flu (LOOK OUT!), but that meant we had a lot of ingredients lying around. So why not still make a drink? We weren’t the ones that were sick, so we could have all the alcohol we wanted.

Easy to find news this week. A 78-year-old Trump supporter punched a protestor for essentially no reason at a rally on Wednesday. Thankfully, he’s now been charged with assault and disorderly conduct, even though he wasn’t detained at the event itself. He said, after he punched the protestor, “We don’t know who he is, but we know he’s not acting like an American…. The next time we see him, we might have to kill him.” I will refrain from being political. Mostly. Let’s hope Trump never drinks champagne to celebrate a nomination.

Champagne Punch Ingredients

12. Champagne Punch

(Per bottle.)

  • 1 quart bottle of wine. [This is, annoyingly, 1.25 750ml champagne bottles. I ended up roughly proportioning everything else in 4/5ths as well. My guess is it would work fine if you just took this as a regular champagne bottle.]
  • ¼ lb. of sugar. [~half a cup.]
  • 1 orange sliced.
  • The juice of a lemon.
  • 3 slices of pineapple. [I took this to mean rings? Up to you.]
  • 2 oz. raspberry or strawberry syrup. [I used the syrup I made for the Brandy Punch!]
  • Ornament with fruits in season, and serve in champagne goblets.
  • This can be made in any quantity by observing the proportions of the ingredients as given above. Four bottles of wine [So five of OUR bottles] make a gallon, and a gallon is generally sufficient for fifteen persons in a mixed party. For a good champagne punch [Umm… Is this one NOT good? Sending mixed signals here, Jerry.], see “Rocky Mountain Punch,” No. 43.

Champagne Punch Creation GIF

Tasting Notes:

BN: First, we really need champagne glasses… I liked this a lot. He stuffs a lot of his drinks (or at least the punches) full of fruit, which is often a little much for me, but all of these have worked out well so far. It actually tastes very different from the brandy punch, which is surprising since it’s almost the same exact ingredients. I wish it were a little bubblier, and a little less sweet, but that could just be the André.

PiC: I really liked it. I imagine it’s a deadly drink because it’s very sugary and doesn’t taste at all like alcohol. It’s almost like drinking a juice. Plus, it’s very pretty – almost a rose gold which is very trendy right now.

 

Kopke Fine Ruby Port – News Flash

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I think I like port now.

That’s the main conclusion I’ve drawn, after trying this very nice Kopke Fine Ruby Port, as well as the Port Wine Sangaree from a few weeks ago.

My first experience with port was about 10 years ago now, on a cold Christmas Eve night in Aberystwyth, Wales. It was included in a prix fixe meal as an after dinner drink, and I was super excited (for some reason), but when it came I hated it. Syrupy, too sweet, too alcoholic… I just wasn’t having it. A disappointing end to a delicious meal. And so, as a first impression, it was a poor one, and since then I’ve assumed that I didn’t like port. But now more and more I feel like it was probably just bad port.

Anyways, back to the Kopke. We received this as a part of the PiC’s Cheese of the Month subscription from the Cheese Store of Silverlake (if you’re in LA, check them out!) and it was a great choice. Just looking at the bottle,  I loved the design – it almost looks like a fake wine bottle from a cartoon or something (I pictured seeing XXX on the other side, like a big jug o’ alcohol). When we poured it, it was a beautiful deep ruby color. Apparently, and I just learned this, ruby port is aged in stainless steel, so doesn’t oxidize or change color (unlike tawny, etc., aged in wooden barrels).

Tastewise, it was very nice, fruit-forward and not too sweet or alcoholic tasting. Paired perfectly with the cheese that we had, and you could sip on this for a long time without getting tired, or it turning saccharine. A very fine ruby port. (See what I did there?)

It seems to retail for around $14.99, and a bottle would last you a fair amount of time (you wouldn’t want to drink it all in one sitting).

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143. Gin Sour

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There are a large number of drinks in The Bartender’s Guide that are modifications on other drinks that he lists, and there are also some pretty classic ones. The Gin Sour manages to be both. I stupidly didn’t also make the Gin Fix (141) which is literally the exact same as this, but with seasonal fruits on top (and no lemon juice). I probably will wait a while to make that one, though, so you can just imagine it for now. In terms of sours, I’m much more used to whiskey and amaretto sours, but it stands to reason that you could make them with other spirits as well.

I couldn’t find anything super relevant for Gin or Sour on the news front, but I did find this cool article from The Daily Beast from a few weeks ago talking about the rise of gin‘s popularity in 1700s England. They equate it to meth, in that everyone was making it in their basements, and it was causing all sorts of trouble in society (more crime, obviously more drunkenness, etc.) Everyone developed a taste for it on the continent, and it was cheap and easy, so they brought it back. A fun quick read, and I’ll work on getting more punny news articles next week.

Gin Sour Ingredients

143. Gin Sour

(Use small bar glass.)

  • 1 tablespoon of sugar.
  • ¼ of a lemon.
  • 1 oz of water
  • 2 oz of gin.
  • Press the juice of the lemon in the glass. Fill two-thirds full of shaved ice. Stir with a spoon. [Technically I’m combining two recipes, the Gin Fix and the Gin Sour, to make the one understandable without the other. Don’t worry about it.]

Gin Sour Process

Tasting Notes:

BN: This was pretty good. It’s pretty sweet (I wonder if a tablespoon might have been smaller back then and I therefore put too much in), and I’m not the hugest gin fan. The herbal notes of the gin, though, might distract from how sweet it is (a good thing), so maybe with another spirit it would be too much. If I made it again, I’d like something to cut it, maybe a bitters?

PiC: I liked this. It tastes like what I might imagine a lemon drop martini would taste like, or one of those lemon drop candies. It’s a little medicinal (the gin, probably). I’d drink this — but I’d like a sugar rim on it! [BN: Jerry Thomas actually does do this for some drinks, which he calls “crustas.” Stay tuned!]

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Figueroa Mountain Brewing Co. – Boozy Newsie News Flash

Figueroa Mountain

Over Valentine’s Day weekend, the Partner in Crime and I went to the sleepy, semi-Danish town of Solvang, which was a really nice trip. It’s deep in wine country (the southern part, not the Napa / Sonoma part), and had beautiful sceneryæbleskivers, and an ostrich farm, where I learned that ostriches are weird and emus are basically dinosaurs.

It also had a lot of alcohol. Of course wine, but also beer, spirits, and more. Of particular interest was the Figueroa Mountain Brewing Co., as I’d had a few beers from there in the past and enjoyed them immensely. We actually found it by accident; we were at Ascendant Spirits (a distillery right next door) and they mentioned it was nearby, so we went up.

They had an indoor tap room, but as it was 85° F or so, we sat outside at a cozy picnic table with a welcome sun umbrella, all on astroturf. Sadly, I forgot to take a picture of this. We got two flights of beer, four of their classics, and four seasonal / rotating taps, which were almost all really delicious.

THE CLASSICS

Fig Beer 2

Paradise Rd Pilsner
Very nice, easy drinking. Doesn’t taste like a pilsner to me which is a good thing, because I don’t like pilsners usually. It had a hint of hops, but only enough that you actually wanted to drink it, and it was a welcome bitterness (IPAs and such are too bitter for me, usually).

Danish Red Ale
It was too warm by the time we got to it, but that’s not the beer’s fault. I liked the caramel notes, and it wasn’t too bitter — I almost wish it were a little bit more bitter!

Davy Brown Ale
This is one of the ones I’ve had before. It has a richer flavor, good malty and chocolately notes. Very tasty.

Stagecoach Stout
A little coffee-y for me, but has nice flavors, velvety smooth texture, almost creamy. Also, still had a head on it after 30 minutes or so, which was impressive.

THE OTHER ONES

Fig Beer 3

Hüll Melon Saison
A little on the hoppy side, and doesn’t have much flavor to it other than the hops. A little lemon peel flavor too, but generally not that interesting… I liked the pilsner better (a phrase I never thought I would say).

Surfliner Lager
You could drink this for forever and never have any issues with it. Very light, almost like a beer-flavored juice. I wish it had been a little bit more carbonated, but that could have been the heat, as well. Easy drinking!

Mosaic Pale Ale
Tasted like an APA, which it was, and was actually sort of nice — the bitterness didn’t linger too long, unlike some other hops. Very floral aroma. As far as hoppy beers go, it wasn’t so bad — we didn’t love the taste, but we could definitely drink it and not feel sad about it.

5th Anniversary
A Doppelbock aged for eight months in rum barrels. This was the best. Smells and tastes like caramel. Very sweet, a lot of depth of flavor. Almost syrupy in texture, and 12% which doesn’t hurt either.

Overall, it was a great trip up, and only a few hours from LA. If you’re looking for a weekend getaway to travel, eat, and drink, Solvang is your place. And of course, you can definitely get the beer without even taking a trip, so definitely check it out!

205. Scotch Whiskey Skin

Don't make this.

Hoo boy. Well, you can’t win ’em all. That’s really the only intro I have for this drink.

On the current events front, in something that will be old news by the time this goes up, Scotland is really sucking in the Six Nations rugby tournament. Sucking almost as bad as this drink does (eight straight losses). Rugby, though, is really cool actually, and the USA’s own Pro Rugby league is starting up this spring! Just don’t drink this while you’re watching.

Use these for something better.

205. Scotch Whiskey Skin

(Use small bar glass.) [Or a mug, because it’s hot. Or just don’t make this.]

  • 2 oz. Scotch whiskey.
  • 1 piece of lemon peel.
  • Fill the tumbler one-half full with boiling water.

Please don't make this.

Tasting Notes:

BN: In case it wasn’t abundantly clear, I hated this. It tasted like really hot watered-down scotch that was slightly bitter (from the lemon peel). So, exactly what it was. I generally like toddies, but they really need a sweetener in there. I’m not sure how anyone can drink this. There’s a small chance a stronger-flavored scotch could have made it better, like a Caol Ila, but I sincerely doubt it.

PiC: Eugh.

228. Soda Nectar

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This was a very exciting drink for me, less for the particular flavors and mix itself, and more for the interesting technique it allowed me to learn. In short, if you put a little baking soda into an acidic drink, it makes it bubbly! Which totally makes sense, but it’s not something I had ever thought about before. Who needs a SodaStream when you have baking soda? (But note that I still do have one.)

The Soda Nectar is also notable for being non-alcoholic. Thomas actually has a number of non-alcoholic concoctions in his book — a lot of various lemonades, among other things — and I’m excited to go through those as well. Especially the orgeat lemonade, but that’s another entry.

One note about this one: he uses “carbonate of soda” which is technically different from baking soda (Na2CO3 versus NaHCO3) but may not actually be edible? Obviously it’s basically edible (you can actually make it just by heating up baking soda for a while) but there were enough conflicting sources online that I chose not to use it. Also it’s hard to find. “Washing soda” is the other name for it.

In a surprisingly relevant piece of soda news, Pepsi is going to be opening a restaurant in New York Meat Packing District this spring called the “Kola House,” with cuisine “inspired by the exploration of the kola nut.” Which actually sounds kind of cool, as long as they’re open to serving Coke instead of Pepsi.

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228. Soda Nectar

(Use large tumbler.)

  • Juice of 1 lemon.
  • ¾ tumblerful of water.
  • Powdered white sugar to taste. [I probably used about 3 tablespoons, which shows you how sweet sodas are.]
  • ½ teaspoon of carbonate of soda. [Again, I used baking soda here.]
  • Strain the juice of the lemon, and add it to the water, with sufficient white sugar to sweeten the whole nicely. When well mixed, put in the soda, stir well, and drink while the mixture is in an effervescing state.

Soda Nectar Fizz

Tasting Notes:

BN: As I mentioned before, the drink itself was not super fascinating; it’s basically just bubbly lemonade. However, I just can’t get over the baking soda thing. It kept it bubbly for a while, too — it wasn’t like a grade-school volcano — and I definitely want to try it again in other circumstances!

PiC: It was cool! It was basically like a lemon soda — it’s a cool way of doing that and it didn’t taste like baking soda which was good. Let’s try it with other flavors! (And can we do it with non-acidic flavoring? SCIENCE!)

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¡Tepache! Pineapple Cider – Boozy Newsie News Flash

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Been a while since one of these, but the Boozy Newsie News Flashes are just quick reviews of drinks, places, events, anything that I’ve experienced recently. Here’s the latest!

I’ve had a lot of ciders, of varying types (hard, sparkling, regular, pasteurized, raw and probably dangerous…) and my favorite is still the fresh-from-the-press bottles you can get at Russell Orchards in Essex, Massachusetts. Not trying to be hipster and know about niche places — mainly it’s right near where I grew up.

Until a few weeks ago, though, I had never had cider made from anything but apples and a few pear versions. Until Reverend Nat came along with a pineapple one. Technically, it’s Padre Nat, just like Trader’s Joe’s Jose / Giotto / Ming / etc. variations for its foreign foods.

Called ¡Tepache!, exclamation points included, you’re instructed to mix 2:1 with a light beer (for best results). We tried both that concoction (¡Tepache!-Tecate is a mouthful) as well as drinking it neat, and it was definitely an interesting experience.

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Tasting Notes:

BN: The cider was very sweet and light orange in color, with only a hint of carbonation. It wasn’t as acidic as pineapple juice is, but still had a good flavor of the fruit. Honestly, it tasted a little more like juice than it did cider or beer. I suppose that’s why they want you to mix it. Putting it together with a can of Tecate we had laying around somewhere, it added the right body and bubbles to the drink, without overpowering the pineapple flavor. It tasted like an unusual shandy, and I liked it, though I’m not sure I would have it again. It could be good for mixing in other combinations, but by itself it didn’t really have the right kind of oomph that I would be looking for in such a drink.

PiC: I definitely liked it better with the Tecate, but it was a little too sweet without it. It should taste more alcoholic.

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2. Brandy Punch

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In theory, I would start with the first recipe. But this book has the confusing method of starting the section with a vague description of how best to make whatever particular type of drink it’s discussing (in this case punches) and then with the first real recipe ignoring everything that came before. But since this is the first concrete recipe, I’m going to do it, and then maybe go back to #1 once all of the punches are complete. Then maybe I’ll understand what he’s trying to get me to do. Maybe.

In the real world, Brandy Clark released a new single on Friday. Brandy Clark is pretty much the greatest — she’s written songs for essentially all of the biggest country stars (and the ones who are less huge but probably better, like Kacey Musgraves), and also has a really good album, 12 Stories, which you should check out. It’s on Spotify! Her new album is coming out in April. This has been a PSA from your friendly Boozy Newsie.

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2. Brandy Punch

(Use large bar glass.)

  • 1 table-spoonful raspberry syrup. [Made this from this Imbibe recipe.]
  • 2 do. white sugar. [so as not to have to put a note every time from now on, I’m going to replace the do. (ditto) with the actual amount.]
  • 1 wine-glass water. [2 oz.]
  • 1½ wine-glass brandy. [I’m also going to adjust to modern measurements. This one’s 3 oz.]
  • ½ small-sized lemon.
  • 2 slices of orange.
  • 1 piece of pine-apple.
  • Fill the tumbler with shaved ice, shake well, and dress the top with berries in season; sip through a straw. [Again, no straw, and I used some raspberries to match the syrup.]

Only thing I’d add here is that I decided rather than using the lemon as a garnish, he meant to squeeze the juice in. The pineapple I put in the glass early so some of the juice should have gotten in as well, but everything else was garnish.

Brandy Punch Prep

Tasting Notes:

BN: You can taste all the elements and they meld well. It’s not super sweet, which is odd because there’s both syrup and sugar in there, but I really like it! The best of the ones I made today.

PiC: It’s almost whiskey sourish, but fresher. That’s GOOD. It’s like a Sour Patch Kid in a drink! The raspberry and the sourness match to be just like the candy. We should remember this one.

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Bonus shot of raspberry syrup:

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